Look out for these 4 signs to know if you are Demisexual
Nowadays with so many dating apps at your fingertips, quickly swiping right for a potential relationship or hookup has never been easier. But if it sounds totally unappealing to you and not just because, well online dating can suck, it may be because you are demisexual.
For those who don't know, demisexuality falls under the asexuality umbrella, and basically means you aren't attracted to people you don't know or aren't friends with.
A therapist and a counsellor explains it it like this: the typical person is going to meet someone and there is usually some degree of physical attraction we form within seconds. With demisexuality, there is no physical pull at all.
It's really about romantic feelings, love, and friendship, that really comes first. The sexual attraction and desire would come second and is certainly not the driving force.
According to asexuality, in general, demisexuals are not sexually attracted to anyone of any specific gender however when they are emotionally connected to someone else they experience sexual attraction and desire, but only towards the specific partner or partners.
If this sounds like you, here are 4other signs you might be demisexual
Looks are mostly irrelevant
For most people. Looks while maybe not the most important part of a relationship are important on some level. In fact plenty of us swipe right based solely on an attractive photo begiyeveven reading a profile. But for demisexuals, physical appearance is a non factor. Demi sexuals are attracted to personalities over faces, and are more interested in creating authentic connections based on similar interests above all else.
Most of your relationships start out as friendships
Because completely getting to know a potential partner is of immense importance to demisexuals, they often find themselves developing feelings for their friends. Which could mean, most, if not all, of your relationships blossom out of friendships.
You enjoy SEX but its not super important to you
Unlike a lot of people, SEX isn't particularly high on many demisexuals list of priorities. That's not to say they don't enjoy SEX, but the physical act holds significantly less importance than, say, intellectually stimulating conversations.
First dates are a huge deal for you
First dates can be significant for anyone, but for someone who identifies as demisexual, they're kind of a big deal. If you are demisexual, you probably like to talk about deep topics on the first date in order to understand the other persons personality, check your comparability, and not just waste your time.
But this may also be a negative thing. Your desire to get to know someone may lead you to obsess about everything concerning your upcoming date. It's almost as if your first date will be a sort of interrogation, and you're just in it for the information.
You don't want to hurt anyone by dating them unless you know for sure you're attracted to them, and you can't be sure unless you continue to date them for a while which ultimately leaves you in a tricky position.