Fighting the demons

Supreme Court declared five-year jail term for the actor, Dutt is both relieved and scared. Relieved that the demons have turned into reality and scared to relive the nightmare! For five years Sanjay has lived under a sword's edge. For five years he has feared arrest and now that SC declared a five year jail term for the actor, Dutt is both relieved and scared. Relieved that the demons have turned into reality and scared to relive the nightmare! As the actor works 24X7 to complete his assignments, his family and friends hold pujas in hope of a miracle. As the countdown begins for his surrender I rewind the tragedy of a marked man... One can describe his life as a story of misfortunes or as the story of a man who refused to learn from his mistakes. Destiny blessed him with innumerable opportunities Sanjay misused them at every step to live life recklessly. Born to illustrious parents Sunil Dutt and Nargis, both legendary actors, Sanjay grew up in the lap of luxuries. To keep him away from attention and pampering Sunil Dutt sent Sanjay to a boarding school but Sanjay ran away from Panchgini and never made it to the gates of a college. Sanjay wanted to become an actor like his parents so Nargis- Sunil planned a dream launch for him �'Rocky'. 'Rocky' should have been a turning point for Sunil Dutt's banner Ajanta Arts but unknown to his parents Sanjay was addicted to drugs and a cause of deep concern for his film makers and family. Sanjay has often said in all his interviews that when his mother Nargis passed away, he was in no condition to bid her a farewell and went through the ritual of lighting her funeral pyre on auto pilot. Nargis's demise was in a way the beginning of his misfortune and given the number of troubles the actor has attracted it is a minor miracle that he has survived a career spanning three decades. He seldom delivered super hits at the box-office yet his producers paid him his price.

He was never the conventional hero but the audience loved him as much as the characters he portrayed. Perhaps Sanjay took his macho image too seriously. He enjoyed being on a rollercoaster ride and missed all the warning signals. The more dangers he courted, the more fearless he turned. He was shooting for Subhash Ghai's 'Khalnayak' when he was arrested under Terrorist and Disruptive Activities Act (TADA) and spent 16 months in jail as an under trial. In solitary confinement Sanjay realised perhaps for the first time that all along he has received more than given in every relationship. He confessed that every time he got into trouble, his father and sisters mobilised support to bail him out. Every time he was to leave the country for foreign shooting, his producers challenged authorities and every time he was sent behind bars, the media and fans worked overtime to change his public perception. Every time it seemed like it was his last mistake but misfortune followed him like a bad dream. In November 1993, a 90,000 page long primary charge sheet was filed against the 189 accused in the 1993 Mumbai bomb blasts case including Sanjay Dutt and the actor was taken into custody to Arthur Road jail in Mumbai. It was time for a reality check up! Sanjay Dutt realised that life is not cinema and he is no hero. For too long he had run away from responsibilities. He took to drugs because his mother died of cancer. He broke off with his first girlfriend Tina Munim because he couldn't cope with his failure. In the 90s' he married Richa Sharma but lost her to cancer. Years later to get over loneliness he married Rhea Pillai but it didn't work and preferred being a single parent to daughter Trishala. As an actor he made sporadic attempts to alter his vulnerable victim image, but the reckless roles refused to let him go like the one in Mahesh Manjrekar's 'Vaastav' where the frustrated criminal is forced to end his life. Sanjay, now older and wiser was aware of the pitfalls of such roles and as a conscious effort to change his screen image lapped up roles like 'Munnabhai MBBS', 'Parineeta' and 'Lage Raho Munnabhai'. On the advise of his well wishers he became a goodwill ambassador for the Intergovernmental Institution for the use of Micro-algae Spirulina Against Malnutrition (IIMSAM) and gradually Sanjay submitted to the movement. His ghosts of past continued to chase him but he was human and yearned for a companion to share his anxieties. Sanjay decided to marry a third time. He believed he would be able to overcome pressures with emotional support and for the first time he was not wrong. He married small time actress Manyata and became father of two bonny kids. In January 2009, Dutt announced that he would contest the 2009 Lok Sabha elections on the Samajwadi Party ticket. He later withdrew his candidacy in March, after the Supreme Court refused to suspend his conviction but Dutt campaigned for the Samajvadi Party nevertheless. His well wishers advised that affiliating with any specific party would alienate him from any help from others but Dutt was committed. He is a grown up and knew what he was doing. Recently at a press conference Sanjay broke down in front of the media. There is nothing wrong with a weak moment but I feel it is time for Dutt to let bygone be bygone and for once and for all to get over with the demons of the past so that they don't come hounding again! www.bhawanasomaaya.com