Valuing your Emotional Quotient a necessity and a reward

Intelligence and brilliance are buzzwords in today's world and are often employed as determinants in judging people's worth. Whether it is the scores we get on a test, or the speeches we deliver, or how we deal with work, there is a consistent iteration on the need to be good and smart at what we do.

While the intelligence quotient and outward excellence are undeniably important, in their heedless celebration, we often lose sight of the significance of emotional intelligence and well-being. A healthy emotional quotient indicates good mental health and substantial introspection which translates into better performance in a world that privileges the external. After all, how much can we contribute on the external front if our most intimate of foundations are shaky?

As we grow up, emotions seldom get the treatment they should. Most techniques of dealing with a child's emotions focus on ensuring repression instead of enabling articulation. Consequently, kids grow up to become emotionally repressed adults, who do not know how to deal with messy scenarios, and can respond with either aggression or more repression and can turn out to be emotionally volatile. In any case, the mental and emotional health of individuals gets unsparingly mishandled.

A high emotional quotient inevitably also yields good professional results. Forbes reports in a 2015 article that TalentSmart tested emotional intelligence alongside 33 other workplace skills, and found emotional intelligence to be the strongest predictor of performance at work, explaining a 58 per cent of success in all types of jobs. This barely comes as a surprise as once we can look inside unapologetically, we can also impact the outside domain in beneficial ways. If we understand ourselves well, we are likely to interpret work and responsibilities well since how we perceive them are narratives constructed by our own perspectives. To be productive employees, better citizens and rational social actors, we must remain in touch with our inner selves and pay heed to its requirements and responses to stimuli.

At a personal and spiritual level, having a strong emotional core can help combating stress, anxiety and exhaustion and make everyday lives appear inviting, fulfilling and exciting. Imagine how easy it would be to rustle up your breakfast if you were not burdened by unwanted stress or repressed feelings. Utilising your emotional quotient is an act of self-securing and letting yourself cope with life in a healthy and dignified way.

However, since there is little emphasis on interiority and emotions in our usual scenarios and the world expects back-breaking work from us, what do we do to keep ourselves emotionally secure while keeping ourselves productive and participating in our everyday existences? To begin, it is best to inaugurate a culture of self-awareness in our lives and let it materialize in uplifting ways. This entails simply looking at ourselves and how we respond to what life presents us with. Do I respond to anger with anger, or do I turn my back on it? Do I let it derail my plan to talk to my parents, or do I process it to let my plans unfold as expected? These seemingly small questions need to be pondered, to comprehend what damage has been done, how we need to heal and how well we have done in messy situations.

Linked to the last concern is the necessity of self-affirmation. A constricted selfhood irrevocably causes compromised personas, and ruins possibilities of effective engagement with people and rational responses to events. We must prize, cherish and assert our selfhood and dignity to learn about ourselves, as self-care cannot occur without a necessary emphasis on the self. If I do not think I am worth preserving, what can I sustain through self-knowledge? Therefore, it is significant to give ourselves credit for surviving tough times and our accomplishments and believe that we are worthy to dream and feel better.

While understanding and affirming ourselves, we should also put knowledge of the self to immediate and good use. This is a fundamentally transformative idea as it is about changing behavioural patterns which did not work for us and replacing them with modes of acting that do justice to our capabilities. An emotionally intelligent person remains dynamic and responds to situations as they unfold and is consequently better prepared for situations of conflict and disappointment.

If we know ourselves and are secure in that knowledge, we can battle conflict without apology or doubt, communicate effectively and place ourselves in self-fuelled powerful positions in the stickiest of circumstances. A good emotional quotient enables ending trouble in neat ways, while keeping ourselves away from unnecessary anguish.

Existence without an emotional anchor is a sinking ship, and thus, we must cultivate a strong, self-aware emotional foundation to keep ourselves afloat. To quote Tara Meyer Robson, "When awareness is brought to an emotion, power is brought to your life." Therefore, no matter what the world demands of us, we need to privilege what we feel and how we feel it and learn from it. We must avoid running away from inner selves and channel our emotions to build a scintillating path to success, contentment and peace.

(The author is founder of Upsurge Global and Senior Advisor, Telangana State Innovation Cell)